Tackling rejection

Annie* will never forget the feeling. An experienced fundraiser, she had caved in to pressure from a manager and asked a donor to support a project that she knew he wasn't interested in.

He said no.

"I'd never want anyone to feel the way I did then," says Annie, who eventually recovered the relationship with the donor. (His next gift was in the millions).

Managers who have worked at the fundraising coal-face know that some rejection is unavoidable. As Russell Delew, director of Major Giving & Appeals at Cancer Research UK, says, "Simply put, the more people you ask, the more say yes. Inevitably, you'll also hear more 'no's. It's not personal, but you can learn from the experience and maybe refine your approach next time."

How can managers help fundraisers to learn from rejection? Annie's donor said no because she asked him to support the wrong project. Donors also say no when they're asked at the wrong time, for the wrong amount, or by the wrong person. Experienced managers know that prevention beats a cure - they understand donors' priorities and avoid putting their fundraisers in the firing line. They can also consider some of the practical steps below for tackling, as well as preventing, the four classic rejections.

The fundraiser asked at the wrong time
Managers can advise staff to ask, 'Is this a good time to talk about a gift?' rather than, 'Can you give now?' If the answer's no, the door remains open for another conversation.

Donors appreciate fundraisers who respect their own timescale. They may even share information about personal circumstances that affect their current willingness or ability to give; the sale of a business for example, or an impending retirement. Such conversations pave the way for better asks later. Often, a mere 12 months transforms rejection into eager acceptance.

The fundraiser asked for the wrong amount
The last thing anyone wants to hear is, 'What on earth makes you think I can afford that?' Fundraisers can apologise graciously, asking donors what they had in mind. They can also get to know donors well enough to pitch the right amount. Or they can ask for 'entry level' gifts (£100, for example) or offer a menu: £5,000 achieves X, £5 million achieves Y.

Some fundraisers ask: 'What's the most we can ask for without offending you?' It's a powerful question, putting donors where they most like to be: in the driver's seat. The answer is often a pleasant surprise.

The fundraiser asked for the wrong cause or project
Flexible, donor-centred approaches help prevent stalemate rejections. Sometimes however, there's little to say except 'thank you for listening'. If you save animals and the donor wants to save children, there may be no middle ground. But donors are swayed by emotion, and those who say no today may say yes to another project tomorrow - especially if they know your charity well or support your cause in general. Fundraisers and managers need to think carefully before giving up on a prospect. Often, it's the timing that's wrong, or the donor may simply need a more compelling proposition.

The wrong person asked
Of all the mistakes, this is the most dangerous. The fundraiser has misread the donor's sense of status. Managers beware - donors offended by 'some junior person' can, and do, silently remove charitable legacies from their wills. It's the costliest rejection of all, even if it's buried from view.

The best managerial medicine for this rejection is preventive. Many managers tell fundraisers, 'I'm available to close deals - just wheel me out'. All too often these words really mean: 'Don't waste my time unless there's a gift I can close that will make me look good. I'm too senior to risk rejection'.

Rather than wait passively for guaranteed success, managers can reduce future rejections - and pave the way for future gifts - with a few simple steps. They can, for example, call and thank new donors, write notes to loyal supporters or drop into prospect meetings. The message to donors is clear: the charity's senior managers value donors and care about their opinions and feelings.

Mentor Managers
Many great fundraisers had 'mentor managers' who took them on donor visits early in their careers.

"I gained so much just by watching," says Stephanie Moran, major donor manager at Plan UK. "Simple things, such as not putting lots of documents between you and the donor, and using your own words rather than a set script."

Fundraisers who witness mature, relaxed behaviour, even when meetings don't go as planned, soon gain confidence and make fewer errors in judgement, earning fewer painful rejections. Most importantly, donors feel less rejected when meeting with confident fundraisers. As much as fundraisers dislike high pressure and shabby treatment, donors loathe it even more.

Many managers acknowledge fundraisers' extra need for external support. Carole Easton, deputy chief executive at Changing Faces, protected her fundraisers' professional development budgets even in tough times.

"Fundraisers face so much rejection, and they don't have the stimulation of daily contact with front-line beneficiaries," says Easton. "They really need that extra boost of networking and training to stay motivated."

To sum up: managers who want to help fundraisers tackle rejection can do more than mutter 'better luck next time'. They can foster insight into why donors say no, and how to respond. They can give fundraisers the best possible tool-kit for preventing rejection in the first place. They can model best practices by asking donors directly, and they can give fundraisers access to top quality training.

Last but not least, managers should remember that fundraisers often have outstanding emotional intelligence. Annie's ability to read people well and respond appropriately saved a key relationship. Her only crime was to listen to her manager rather than her heart. Her manager's crime was greater: he forgot to listen to Annie. For most fundraisers, that's the most painful rejection of all.

*not the fundraiser's real name

Elizabeth Loudon is a director of Prospero Partners, a consultancy that helps charities win high value support

• Share:
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
• 
•